Alright, everybody be cool


Carolyn asked me to fix her computer and I stumbled across the link to update her blog. I have to say, my mind is absolutely spinning with the possibilities here. Just think about the all the options you have when you jack your spouse's blog (5 years ago that line could have only been something from the adult entertainment industry and frankly I'm getting a little nauseous thinking about what that would have meant).

Anyhow, back to the blog-jacking. I'm sitting her frothing at the mouth like Amanda Plummer in Pulp Fiction thinking about all of the fun that I can have with this. I thought about posting pictures of Carolyn during her awkward teen years until I found out that this is a central theme of this blog already. I thought I might tell stories about her adorable idiosyncrasies and some of her hysterical brain farts (BTW, fart is her least favorite word and I ask that all of you use it often and creatively in all of your comments moving forward). Unfortunately, self deprecating humor is also another central theme in this blog.

Then I realized that the best option is to do nothing at all. Remember the episode of Seinfeld where Jerry's girlfriend told him that she did "something" to an item in his bathroom and it drove him crazy. I think that the perpetual nervousness she'll have that I might have logged on and shared to much on her blog might actually drive her over the edge. I can just picture her jumping out of bed in the middle of the night to check on her blog because she had a dream that I wrote about the embarrassing thing she did one night after a friend's wedding.

I love you to honey bunny!


"Jane, you ignorant slut."

Well aren't you just the cleverest little monkey, hacking into my blog? You'd like to think you could divulge all kinds of secrets about me, but as you mentioned above, that's sort of the main theme around here. So have at it. Go ahead. Hack away, pal.

Just wait till I start telling the world (or the small part of it that reads here regularly) your dirty little secrets. Don't worry, I'll think of some.

Watch your back, friend. You might want to sleep with one eye open, that's all I'm saying.


donna said...

I've always thought you looked more like Tim Roth than Amanda Plummer but if you have the need to channel a woman, I'm not one to judge.

RYak said...

What a fanFARTING tastic entry! Funny FUJ.

Fart thee well, Guwi!

Did you just FFfffaaart, Guwi?.

Guwi is Farting.

Guwi Farted 5 minutes ago.

What the fart, Guwi?


Guwi's apple pie is Fartalicious!


Guwi said...


The really funny thing is that he said, "Oh, also? I changed your password."

He changed it to what it already was. This tells me two things: I'm a one-trick pony when it comes to passwords, and also?


God but I hate that f-word.

Anonymous said...